Unlikely Martha
Life

So You Know its Real?


If you’ve traveled the blogosphere you are well versed in the reality that different people blog about different things. Some lead fantastic lives and live in dust free homes, while the rest of us just move the clutter out of the way , choose to see the light at the end of the tunnel even if its only a pinhole, and others are just Debbie Downers

..and that’s fine.

One thing that baffles me is when people get upset or express their disdain for people who don’t *does the quotation thingy with my fingers* keep it real in their tweets, or on their blog.

This is the thing. If you’ve walked this earth long enough you know there isn’t a person alive that hasn’t seen sorrow and trouble as well as triumph and happiness. Not everyone chooses to dwell on those things. Writing and pining over those things does nothing for me. I’ll read yours but I choose not to put my energy into those things other than trying to find a resolution when it comes to my own life.

If a person wants to write about rainbows and unicorns…let them. If you’re so caught up in your realness that you can’t be happy for someone else…don’t read.

What’s real to one person isn’t another person’s reality and the REAL is not everyone lives a sad and awful life, some of us are living and rolling with the punches no matter how hard they hit…I don’t know about y’all but I bobs and weaves in my skinny jeans and wedges…and I don’t care what anyone thinks about it.

Yeah, I have obstacles. I stumble. I trip. I fall dead on my face. You’ll never know. I’ll share what I feel, but it will never be so anyone else knows its real. I know its real.

*slams the piano shut*

*curtsies and turns on heels*

Do you feel the need to let folks know all of the good and bad in your life?

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25 Comments

  • Reply
    Cam - Bibs & Baubles
    June 12, 2012 at 1:45 am

    Girl, I don’t know what brought this on but this post is all of that! Everybody screaming keep it real but real seems to only mean miserable. No ma’am… I’ll pass on that. There is more than one version of real and miserable ain’t mine.
    Cam – Bibs & Baubles recently posted..Time to Sit it Down

  • Reply
    The Chic SAHM
    June 12, 2012 at 7:31 am

    I too am one of those people that prefers to focus on the positive. It doesn’t mean my life is perfect. (cause it isn’t) It just means that I find no value on dwelling on the things that I can not change. Like 50 just told Oprah, pray or worry don’t do both!
    The Chic SAHM recently posted..Author Dreams 2

  • Reply
    The Chic SAHM
    June 12, 2012 at 7:38 am

    I too am one of those people that prefers to focus on the positive. Telling someone else about your problems and dwelling on them doesn’t do much for your situation. Venting is one thing but “po mouthing” as my husband calls it is not for me. Like 50 just told Oprah worry or pray but don’t do both.
    The Chic SAHM recently posted..Author Dreams 2

  • Reply
    Rosesdaughter
    June 12, 2012 at 7:39 am

    The problem is that everyone has their own version of keeping it real. What’s real in my life might not be real in yours. And so on and so on. I tussled with this idea for a long time. And I’ve come to a conclusion: I can’t worry about what’s “real” in everyone else’s life or blogs or tweets. Only in mine. Sure I’ll read and comment or rainbows and sunshine and on misery and doom. Whatever your version of “real” is. It’s part of what makes this blogosphere so interesting. So unique. My motto is do you! And don’t worry about anyone else.

    • Reply
      Mimi
      June 12, 2012 at 8:52 am

      Exactly! Some people want to say if people blog/tweet only good things that they aren’t keeping it real, but when it’s all bad it’s somehow real and that’s not true.

  • Reply
    Mrs. Pancakes
    June 12, 2012 at 8:06 am

    Im all about posting whatever someone wants to post…if they want to share some
    Bad things going in their lives…I love to support others but I don’t want someone always talking about bad Things all the time after all that’s why I escape to blogs to get away from all the bad negative things in our world! Great thoughtful
    Post Mimi! Thanks!

  • Reply
    Dre Davis
    June 12, 2012 at 10:19 am

    I say, post what you want! When I only posted positive things, I was accused of “putting on” for folks. When I shared some of my down sides, people still had something to say. Either way, I know what’s real to me and as long as I’m keeping it real with myself, I feel great at the end of the day. Besides, I don’t want to read from someone who’s doing the Debbie Downer business all the time. There’s enough valleys in our own lives to be caught up in others’ pitfalls constantly, right?

    I love this post, Mimi. Very well spoken!
    Dre Davis recently posted..Style Like Kim: Two Looks for Less

  • Reply
    BossyGirl
    June 12, 2012 at 11:11 am

    This right here… I realized a long time ago to let people be who they are.. especially on blogs. I do me..regardless of other’s opinions of what I should be discussing. Sometimes keeping real can go to far and makes me NOT want to read the blog..I mean darn there are some people who EVERYDAY it’s something. They should JUST LIVE!

  • Reply
    Morocco
    June 12, 2012 at 12:16 pm

    I’m so sick of that phrase “Keep it real” lol. As someone pointed out, it is open to interpretation. I’m with you, I don’t feel the need to share my every sorrow and song with the world. I reserve my journal for that. At 34 I’ve had far more dark than light days, however, it’s all about resiliency. I don’t even pray anymore not go through certain things, instead I pray to get through. Good post!
    Morocco recently posted..Pink, Purple, or Fuchsia

  • Reply
    Jenni
    June 12, 2012 at 12:18 pm

    I post what I feel at the time and what’s on my mind. Whether it comes from a happy place, frustration or sadness depends on me. At the end of the day the blog belongs to the writer. We all make choices and the blog world is massive. If you want to read about perfect meals, well-mannered kids, loving husbands and immaculate homes there’s a blog for that. However, if you want to read about burnt food, bad-ass kids, trifling baby daddies and pig pin homes…well…there’s a blog for that, too. The realness is in the choice. If you choose to continuously read blogs you don’t like just to complain about the writer’s point of view, then you’ve chosen to be a “real” idiot!
    Jenni recently posted..How Do You Make Friends?

  • Reply
    krissy
    June 12, 2012 at 12:52 pm

    This is why I blog. I write whatever I want. I don’t do it for readers. My blog isn’t making me money. It’s an outlet and that’s what I use it as. If I don’t like what someone blogs about o won’t read. It really is that simple.
    krissy recently posted..Friday Randomness

  • Reply
    GK
    June 12, 2012 at 1:31 pm

    Interesting post, Mimi. Do people really complain about what others post on THEIR OWN BLOGS? I hated this phrase when it was popular but I can’t think of anything else to say but “Where they do that at?”

    If I don’t care for a blog/its contents, I just don’t read it. It’s that simple.

    I for one am a rainbows and unicorns blogger. Though I occasionally mention my cluttered house, not-always-obedient three-year-old, and personal failures, 95% of the time, I’m posting all things happy and fun. Someone has got to be a dang fool to think that my life is perfect because of my blog content. I go through pains and sorrows just like the next person, but I’m not about to fill up my happy space with it. If that’s what you do, then that’s fine. It’s your blog — do your thing. But if that means I’M “not keeping it real,” then feel free to call me the fakest blogger on the planet. And while you’re at it, GET A CLUE. 🙂

    Great post, Mimi. It’s crazy to think people have such strong opinions on other people’s stuff.

    ANYHOO, thanks SO much for the info last week! It worked out and we’re going! 🙂
    GK recently posted..Zoo Love

    • Reply
      Mimi
      June 14, 2012 at 12:12 pm

      Yay!! Glad that worked out for you.

  • Reply
    Quiana
    June 12, 2012 at 1:55 pm

    Amen to this line especially, “What’s real to one person isn’t another person’s reality and the REAL is not everyone lives a sad and awful life, some of us are living and rolling with the punches no matter how hard they hit…”

    All the Debbie Downers in my Google Reader lamenting over “goody two-shoes /shiny happy bloggers” have been gettin on my nerves and causing me to glance over their posts or unsubscribe altogether. And that is exactly what’s awesome about the Internet: it’s OUR choice to read or not read. End of discussion!
    Quiana recently posted..Life With Nia: 22 Months

  • Reply
    Kita
    June 12, 2012 at 3:20 pm

    I thought blogging was whatever the writer wanted it to be. If people want to read it that’s fine if you don’t keep it moving. I blog to write out what I am feeling at the time if I am happy my blog will reflect that if I am sad then I will write it down to get it off my chest and keep it moving. People take this blogging way to seriously

  • Reply
    Melisa - Mommy This and That
    June 12, 2012 at 3:44 pm

    Funny…I was just reading a post last week were the blogger talked about how real they were because they talked about things that most “mom bloggers” and bloggers and general don’t. *shrugs* I say do whatever makes you happy in your little corner of the blogosphere, and the hell with what “they” think.
    Melisa – Mommy This and That recently posted..Friday Five

  • Reply
    Tia
    June 13, 2012 at 3:16 pm

    *Drops mic and exits stage left* Love this!!!
    Tia recently posted..Minnie Mouse

  • Reply
    Patrice
    June 13, 2012 at 4:43 pm

    The “keep it real post” so timely and so true!
    Patrice recently posted..Vendors!! Vendors!! Vendors!!

  • Reply
    Nellie
    June 13, 2012 at 9:24 pm

    honestly, I only share stuff (whether its good or bad) if it can help someone. If I can get 1/2 a “amen” then I did something good. Shoutout to the positive bloggers though, sometimes I believe that they HAVE to have all rainbows and unicorns…but its okay because when I’m in a not so good place it warms my heart to read my bloggy friends’ accomplishments.

    I believe in blogging the good and the bad but certainly not everything. And if there is something specific I want to talk about I never include any names I just have a general discussion.

    Keeping it real is what keeps the people coming back…sorry to quote paris but “it gets the people GOING!” I think we can tell whats really real, and what is not so much.
    Nellie recently posted..Disneyworld…Help!

    • Reply
      Mimi
      June 14, 2012 at 1:31 pm

      I like your theory! I read many blogs the good and bad and get encouraged when I see them come out of their bad situations. I think blogging is an amazing community of support. I just some people would really look at from a broad perspective and realize before they criticize that everyone lives a different life and they have the right to blog what they want.

  • Reply
    Stesha
    June 14, 2012 at 12:50 pm

    Some folks just love to stir the pot of misery. If a blogger is too happy “she’s fake.” I just don’t get it! I say let people live and write how they want. As for me? I’m bobbing and weaving right along side you chic!

    Hugs and Mocha,
    Stesha
    Stesha recently posted..Mini Herb Garden

  • Reply
    Aracely
    June 14, 2012 at 1:22 pm

    I say if you don’t like what you’re reading don’t read it! My reality may not be yours that’s what makes it different and interesting! I like to think I’m blogging about whatever is going on in “my” life, good or bad! Sheesh!
    Aracely recently posted..A goal achieved…an eduacational milestone!

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