We all have seen those IG pages, perfectly curated memoirs of fab moms dressed to the nines with million dollar strollers, coiffed hair and perfect meals. Tens of thousands of followers stroll their timelines daily taking in these perfect images, some taking them for face value and others crying in their coffee at the mere fact that their IG page would be littered with poorly lit photos of their homes in disarray as they question, “how does *insert perfect IG feed name here* do it?
” I mean, she has a thousand kids and still manages to look put together and I have one and can’t seem to get my life, let alone head out to Target with a beat face.”
Sometimes I just want to disconnect from the internet, the very internet that has introduced me to so many amazing and powerful women. The internet that over the past 7 years has allowed me to subconsciously document my feelings and life for memories that years from now would have been a distant memory.
The curated reality of the internet will get you if you let it, especially when it comes to motherhood.
I follow sites for nothing more than inspiration and ideas, and can easily decipher reality from what you want me to see. My concern is for those mothers who are struggling with just trying to get the basics together and feel like they keep dropping the apples because as a mother they don’t look as put together, or their clothing isn’t as expensive, or their business isn’t thriving or their Starbucks would be photographed in front of the steering wheel of a non luxury vehicle.
If motherhood is a community, then I think it is time that real moments start out numbering the curated ones. We all love a pretty photo, but as an influencer I have started to ask myself what good am I putting out into this community for that mother trying to find her way. I fully understand every woman and mother has her own free will to think and perceive things as she pleases but the caring nature in me wants to see that mom know she is winning in her sweatpants and messed up brows. If only a suggestion for a quick meal or a Dollar Tree hack to keep her home together I don’t want to feel untouchable in this motherhood space. I don’t want y’all to come look at me be pretty and tell me how hard I slay, I want this online space on the internet to be a source of inspiration and connectable moments that we all experience in life in the realm of parenting, fashion, beauty, home and life.
I want to feel real. The thought that someone could look at my online personality and think that I’m perfect or have a perfect life makes me want to barf. Have you seen my Snapchat and the mess of my life that I document there?
I’ll admit. Some of us really do have things a little more together than others, and are genuinely happy but the reality is likely it hasn’t always been that way, and while we may be strong in one area, we are undoubtedly weak in others.
*talking to myself here*
Take what makes sense to you from this curated community of glam motherhood and don’t feel bad about your reality not being theirs or the one they want you to believe in. We are all just works in progress.
Some a little more curated than others.
As you were.
Photo credit: It’s Really Kita
12 Comments
Christiana
August 9, 2017 at 6:58 amGreat post! That’s why I love your blog!!!!
Lauren
August 9, 2017 at 8:32 amYou better preach MiMi!! Yes to all of this just yes!
Charlotte
August 9, 2017 at 11:08 amYes to all of this!
april brumm
August 9, 2017 at 11:30 amfor sure this is a trap set by the devil himself to slow us down. comparison isn’t always productive. thank you!
Lashawn
August 9, 2017 at 11:54 amSAY ?? THAT??
Bernetta
August 9, 2017 at 11:59 amSo very true. I love this post. You make .want to post a pic of me in my sweats right now!! Motherhood isn’t always easy or glam. Yassss
Shon Valdry
August 9, 2017 at 1:03 pmThis is why I keep coming back here! Thank you so much. Even us, well speaking for myself, older 40ish moms feel a little some kind of way on social media. This post was a timely word for me today. Thank you, Sis!
Felicia
August 9, 2017 at 3:30 pmAnd the church said, “Amen”. Trying to keep up with the Joneses will have you left behind in more ways than one.
Ayanna
August 9, 2017 at 3:40 pmThis. Post. Is. Everything.
Britney
August 9, 2017 at 10:58 pmEarlier this year (and multiple times before), I took a long break from blogging, vlogging, and social media altogether because I felt so over whelmed with visual perfection, which I believed was mandatory for social media success. Meanwhile, I’m over here so far from it. I’m okay with that now but it was discouraging at first.
Erika
August 9, 2017 at 11:05 pmComparison is and will always be the thief of joy.
Angela
August 10, 2017 at 7:30 pmGreat post! Thanks for the insight.