Me – Page 9 – Unlikely Martha

Me• Parenting

Mommy Balance

Becoming a mother by far has been THEE most intimidating and daunting task in my life yet. When I had my son, I threw myself wholeheartedly into motherhood and quickly found myself in a bad space. Prior to having children I travelled, I shopped, I was an all around fun person. Wherever the party was, I was there. So to go from being an outgoing person to a home ridden young mother I was miserable.

I quickly found that it was not necessary to forego “me” to be a mom. With the birth of my daughter I was determined not to fall in that rut again. As hard as it has been I have been making an effort to make sure I get out as often as I can to enjoy some of the things that I did before I had children.

Recently, I have noticed that some people have thrown themselves into motherhood, to the point that every discussion they have or tweet or blog about is their children, breastfeeding, poop, etc. I have nothing against that, we all have our own purpose in life, but it has caused me to think that maybe I am selfish. I mean when I became a mother I knew that was a huge undertaking that would involve giving of myself unconditionally and maybe I am supposed to obsess about parenting and such…or maybe not.

I had a conversation with a good friend of mine and we discussed whether some mothers really enjoy motherhood as much as they proclaim. I am starting to think that some women are groomed to be mothers and they find worthiness in keeping house. But I have come to realize that won’t work for me. I’ve even beat myself up in the process but in the end, its settled… I must have balance. Even if its only a girls night out once a month or conversations regarding nail polish, the fall fashions or the latest song on the radio. I need those interactions. They complete me. They make me feel good.

I didn’t realize how much so until last week when I got together with a couple of women I totally adore and we had a nail polish party. We drank wine, ate cake pops and laughed. It felt good. This past weekend I joined a couple of friends for dinner at a new restaurant here in the city. Again, I felt alive.

My question to you…Is it really possible to love motherhood so much that you no longer care about or even try to do the things that once made you happy or is it all a facade? Do you think its really important to try to find that balance in your life…does it matter?

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Life• Me• Mompreneur

It’s About the Possibilities

As I prepare my mind to embark on a new week, I can’t help but feel a little overwhelmed not only at the things I must do this week, but more perplexed by the things that I wish to accomplish. Despite my strong desire to step out on a ledge and pursue a lofty goal my mind is telling me I can’t get it done. Not because I don’t have the time, but because my mind is singing the tune of fear of rejection and pending failure. I’m dreaming big and with big dreams come work, and with work comes discipline and to be honest at times I am more like the wayward disobedient child to the things that my mind tells me I can do.

Sitting down on Saturday evening I came across an article in MORE magazine written by Kathryn Stockett who is the author of the best seller The Help. In summary the author explains how she received nearly 60 rejections for her manuscript but she never gave up. She explained how she would lie to her husband and friends and would sneak off to hotels on the weekends so she could write. She felt the need to do so in an effort to not explain why after so many rejections she believed in her work and was going to keep at it until somebody saw her vision.

I felt her on this. I find myself muting my dreams of growth for Divinitee and other business aspirations for fear of what some people might say..okay and setting out to do something and failing. FAILURE is a huge thing with me.

Out of the entire article the following passage spoke to me.

“The point is, I can’t tell you how to succeed. But I can tell you how not to: Give in to the shame of being rejected and put your manuscript-or painting, song, voice, dance moves, [insert passion here] – in the coffin that is your bedside drawer and close it for good. I guarantee you that it won’t take you anywhere. Or you could do what this writer did: Give in to your obsession instead. And if your friends make fun of you for chasing your dream, remember- just lie.”

On that note, I’m going to take a stab at it and if I have to lie to your face I will!

What will you set out to accomplish this week that fear says you can’t do?

Have a great week!

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Me• Mimi

Because I Said So

The tag line for my blog reads “The Rants and Raves of a Fab Mom”. Well the other day after the bagger at the grocery store very confidently referred to me as Ma’am I took a quick mental inventory of why he would think I was a Ma’am because in my thoughts at that moment there was nothing “fab” about being a Ma’am. So forgetting that I was wearing a pair of skinny jeans that were a tad too short, some leaned over gold flats, a huge ketchup stain on my shirt courtesy of my son, two strand twists that were all twisted out and needed to be redone days ago, and the dead giveaway that I was pushing two children in a buggy I was appalled. I mean I am fab…right? *nod your head and look straight ahead*

Because I could not leave well enough alone, I just had to corner the young gentleman and ask him just how old did he think I was. Word to the wise, NEVER ask a teenager a question like this..NEVER. He responds with a slight grin, “I don’t know I guess about 40”. *dead* I can’t. At this point, the cashier has finished ringing up my groceries and we are all set to go. I quietly disclose to him that I am 32 like he cared but it gave me some satisfaction in the matter. That’ll show him .

Still on this hours later I started thinking what are the credentials that I possess *in my head* that qualifies me as being fab. Sure I’m more of a connoisseur of Yo Gabba Gabba than the latest fashions to walk the runways of Spring fashion week, nonetheless I would like to think I’ve still got it…a teeny bit. I’ve never been one to need validation..until this day. So I decided to come up with MY own reasons. Wanna hear it? Here it go

I’m Fab Because:

As I type this my nails are gold and sparkly

I listen to Lil Wayne at obscenely loud levels…no, not with the kids in the car. Okay, sometimes.

I’ve been to the club in the last year, not considering the fact that I complained about the loud music the.entire.time

I know how to Dougie..not a whole lot of consolation on this one seeing that Wolf Blitzer did it.

I still wear high platform heels..who cares that my knees hurt for days after

I paint my fingernails weekly

I manage to keep my sanity while chasing behind a budding 11 month old walker and a motor mouth 5 year old ALL DAY LONG

I wear sunglasses whilst driving the Milf mobile, and still get stares at the stop light

I get out of the house alone often and have drinks or dinner with my BFFs

I’m fab because I SAID SO!!

Fab is the shortened version of the word Fabulous which is defined as:

–adjective:Almost impossible to believe;incredible. Exceptionally good or unusual; marvelous; superb

That sounds about riiight.So now that we have the official definition, and I’m quite sure that all of you possess a trait qualifies you as being fab..as if it really matters to anyone else but you. Do share something special about yourself that “ups” your FAB quotient. I mean can you juggle bananas. Can you cook, fold clothes, talk on the phone and check homework simultaneously..What is it?

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Health• Me

It’s All Fun and Games Until….

A few housekeeping items:

First, I am delighted to announce I am now contributing over at Mami 2 Mommy on Mondays. I wasn’t able to blog yesterday so get your boot-ay over there and show your girl and Mami 2 Mommy some love. I’m really excited about the opportunity.

Second, I have noticed over the past week or two I have gained an influx of new followers. Not sure where you came from but I am ecstatic to have you. To all of you who come by to read..Thank you!

On to the good and not so good stuff.

Weekend went {kinda} great. Early Saturday evening, our family and my inlaws got together and headed over to Stone Mountain park for a picnic dinner. While the guys played the girls sat around and chatted.

After that I went and grabbed a pre-birthday cocktail with Niya

Sunday, I hooked up with Niya and another one of the besties and headed over to an event called Parent Palooza. The kids had a ball, and we got to hang out. That’s always a good time.

Hmmmm....

So after all of that. Sunday, I got home to sit down and go through the mail and I got a letter from my doctor. Awhile ago I mentioned that I was battling high blood pressure. I am currently on medication and with some changes to my diet I have managed to get it down to a decent 118/93. Bottom is still a little hight but baby steps. Okay? I went to the Dr. a few weeks go for a Blood pressure visit and they ran some tests and now the tests come back that my cholesterol is Off. THEE. Chain. *rolls eyes*

Sheesh, I mean extremely high..the bad one. She said if I can’t get it under control by my next visit on meds I go. I’m not happy about this. I try to watch what we eat, but I guess sometimes heredity trumps all. So now I am on a quest to find out how to lower cholesterol. I am one of those naturally thin people. I may weigh 135 soaking wet, but it looks like exercise is not an option.

Being a parent means taking care of ourselves, and I have to swallow that pill and understand that I am getting older and need to do a better job at taking care of myself if I am going to be here for my babies.

Any of you have high cholesterol? How do you manage it? How was your weekend?

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