NaBloPoMo – Page 14 – Unlikely Martha

Me• NaBloPoMo

What Was I Doing Again?

So I’m in that space again. That space that has me pondering my purpose in life. I have written often about my desires to own my own business. To be more to my family than a wife and a mother. Yet, I still have failed to succeed at this.

I have so many good ideas, yet my execution skills leave a ton to be desired. I’m easily discouraged and my fear of failure leaves me standing still. I truly believe it is better to try something than to let fear keep you planted on safe terrain. Too bad some parts of me didn’t get the memo.

I don’t beat myself up about it. I am a true believer in timing is everything. Yet, these days my judgement is a little clouded over whether or not my time hasn’t come or if my fear is actually holding me back.

Holding me back from what I don’t know. I start things, I don’t finish them. It’s November and sadly I have completed none of the things I set out to do this year. Again, I’m not beating myself up I just want to get to the point of finding one thing that I am good at AND enjoy and putting my all into it. I wish I knew what it was.

Have you found your purpose? Are you pursuing it or are you like me, notorious for starting a million things with good intentions and following through with none of them.

You know me..right? What do you think I would be good at?!!!

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NaBloPoMo

Jumping on the Bandwagon

So by now if you are a blogger I am sure you have come across the term NaBloPoMo. For those who have never heard of the term. It simply stands for National Blog Posting Month.

The criteria requires you to blog EVERY day for the entire month of November…yes, that includes weekends. Since I am always up to a good challenge I am going to try my hand at this again. Last year I did well until I fell asleep and forgot to post one night within the last week.

This year, I’m rocking it.

Please continue to follow me. I am sure this month will show you a side of me that has yet to be revealed…maybe. There are often things and issues that I would like to bring here, but when I don’t find the time I often forget and blog about what is ever on my mind when I find my way to the computer. Well since I have to blog everyday you will get the total randomness that is me. I’m sorry.

Are you participating?

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Family• NaBloPoMo• Parenting

To Have or Not To Have is the Question

Lil Mama left on Saturday evening and will be gone until Tuesday morning. I miss my baby, and although it has been really nice to have some time to myself at home, I can’t wait for her to come back. Tomorrow, Lil Man and I are going to head out to the city and visit the World of Coca Cola and Children’s Museum’s. He is looking forward to spending some time alone with me. It never really crossed my mind that he misses being the only child until he told me the other day. I now know I have to make a better effort at spending more one on one time with him.

Being a parent is so hard at times. I always want my babies to have the best of me and when he told me that he misses those times it made me feel bad that maybe as a mother I have neglected him in some way. I know I am being “drama queen” but that’s how it made me feel. I think we get so consumed some times in providing the basics for our children that we forget they could really careless about those things and would rather have us and our undivided attention. This is part of the reason why I struggle with having more children. I would love one more but honestly I don’t know if I could be fair and provide each with the level of attention that they would need. I don’t come from a large family, so I know some people have an argument regarding why a large family is suitable but for ME I don’t think its fair to have a house full of children if they can never get time alone with you..they need that time in their early years.

Also, having more children would further limit my time with the Mr. I got married and had children, I don’t think I would ever want to just become parents and married people in passing. Children require alot, and unfortunately they don’t stay sweet squishy babies for long, they grow up, talk back, want to borrow your car etc….I think people fall in love with the baby stage not realizing that as they grow they actually require your time and mental capacity. Parenting is such a huge task, and shouldn’t be taken lightly. Some may say I overthink everything but somethings just can’t be left to chance and that’s how I feel about parenting.

Okay, enough of my ramblings!! How many children do you want to have? How did you come to that conclusion? Am I crazy?!!

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Family• My Babies• NaBloPoMo• Parenting

Family

Lil Mama is in Florida spending a few days with her godmother, and while she is away I have decided to take these days to hug on Lil Man a little tighter and give him some quality one on one time with the Mr. and I. As him and I lay in the bed watching Nick Jr. or Noggin in some places the “Family” song came on and while him and I were singing along, I really paid attention to the words. Family isn’t just relatives its whoever is in your heart…I love this!! I’m so glad you’re my {cyber} family!

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