MOMing

Thank you Allstate for sponsoring this post. I chose to write this post because doing good in local communities is at Allstate’s core.

A few weeks ago, Addison came home so excited to tell her father and I about an idea that she and a friend at school brought to their teacher to recognize the custodians at their school.  As a next step, she was instructed to create a document with ideas on how to execute this project.

I beamed as I watched her excitedly get on the computer, log into Google, and craft a document that she would later print out, outlining her ideas for a Custodian Appreciation Week.

As a member of a sorority, I do my fair share of giving back to my local community, through a variety of activities and donations. It made me smile to see her putting so much effort and excitement into a selfless act, and the thought that my community service may have had an impact on her desire to help others makes me want to do more for our community.

Addison has the biggest heart for others, she’s been known to ask me to get in our neighborhood Facebook group and ask for clothing so she can donate it to children in need.  During our visit to the African American History Museum, she expressed sadness about racism in America, and in the next breath told me how she plans to help other people at her school understand why racism is wrong, and what they can do to stop it.

She is certainly a child of action. I honestly believe some of her dedication towards dance, and other interests comes from being exposed to them at a young age. This is why I’m honest with her about the state of things in our world. From a young age I wanted her to be concerned for things that will affect her generation and know that she has a voice and an obligation to do what she can to change things, even for one person.

Action inspires, and that rings true for children as well. Allstate believes that today’s youth aren’t waiting on the gatekeepers to make change, they are doing it themselves. These children are technologically savvy, and eager to create change. Their fervor to create change spawns lifelong transferable skills, that for a lack of better words, will make them good humans. I mean, some adults haven’t even mastered critical social and emotional learning skills like problem-solving, empathy and teamwork. We all know the best lessons don’t happen in the classroom, and these skills will help ensure their future success.

So cliché, but everything we do as parents is setting a stage for either excellent or subpar behavior, and we have to be careful with our actions because they create habits not just for us, but for them as well.

Allstate stands behind this thought process as well.  They work to empower young people in the communities they live and work in to become leaders and change-makers.

Learn more about what Allstate is doing in local communities and the work they are doing to empower youth.

Their dedication to the communities where they live and work is at the core of Allstate’s  belief system.

I charge us as parents to instill the importance of community giving into our children at an early age. These things will be second nature to them as adults and as a result they will instinctively do what’s right when it comes to giving back and helping out members of not only their communities, but all communities.

A life of true activism can never start too early.

This post was written as part of the Allstate Influencer Program and sponsored by Allstate. All opinions are mine. As the nation’s largest publicly held personal lines insurer, Allstate is dedicated not only to protecting what matters most–but to guiding people to live the Good Life, every day.

This post is sponsored by Scholastic.

I’m currently at the point in my parenting career where the switch has gone off in my head, and I realize that I am no longer merely responsible for their daily things in life, but also understanding my role fully as one of the two most important people that will help mold them into responsible, and hopefully whole, human beings.

This is a huge job.

My talks with Addison recently feel like I’m talking to a friend. She has more advanced questions that need edited, but thoughtful, answers. No lies told here, sis. If she asks, we’re discussing it.

Recently, she asked me if she was “thick.” I thought a minute before responding because I need her to know her body is perfect just how it is. I wasn’t sure if someone said something to her, or she read something about being “thick,” but I just knew my first reaction and answer to the question would be her take-away.

I finally came up with, “If you were, would it make a difference?” Then, I go on a spill about terms not defining us, and how people come in all shapes and sizes. I further explained we need to make sure our bodies are healthy, and she is perfect the way she is. I praised her for her dedication to dance and how proud she must be of her abilities.

See what I did there? I answered her question and laced it with praise and self-love affirmations. I do this every chance I get.

My wish for her is that she learns to understand that all parts of her body are hers, and she should protect them fiercely from a very young age.

She was recently gifted My Wish for You by Kathryn Hahn with illustrations by Brigette Barrager. She has a few favorite pages in the book that she connected to, and they describe her to a tee. I intentionally choose reinforcements that stand behind the things I want her to understand because, if we are being honest, kids don’t always listen to us. This is why positive reinforcements matter.

I try not to overthink this parenting thing, but the pressure is on. We have a huge job, and we need all the help we can get from books to the village. Let’s be intentional about the messages that we are sending to our babies!

Thank you to Athleta Girl for sponsoring this post, and working hard to encourage our girls to #StayInTheGame

As a child I was fairly active, playing the piano and dancing were some of the earliest activities  I can vividly remember. My mother was dedicated to my passions, however somewhere along the way, depending on the the direction of the wind I started to make things difficult by either complying or giving her grief about practicing and attending lessons. Unfortunately my disdain and lack of dedication proved to be strong enough that she decided fighting with me while also sacrificing her time and money  wasn’t worth it, so she let me quit.

QUIT.

We all have those moments, the ones where we reflect on what we wish our parents would’ve done, and how if they had done this or that the outcome of our lives could’ve been different. The reality is the past is gone, and if you are a parent you have a renewed opportunity to encourage your children in the areas you wish could’ve ended differently for you.

For me, this hasn’t been specifically tied to an activity but linked more to instilling in my daughter the life skills that come from dedicating yourself to something and giving it everything you’ve got until the very end. Girls that participate in sports have a higher level of confidence, sense of teamwork, character, and grit. With all of these positive stats, according to The Women’s Sports Foundation girls are still 2X more likely than boys to throw in the towel.

WHY?

Who knows? While I can’t control what anyone else is doing with their girls, I can pour into mine, and offer other mothers encouragement to stay in the game with theirs. Daily, I am reaffirming to my daughter that she is strong, confident and can do what she puts her mind to. I’m constantly reminding her that her dedication to dance is inspiring and she will go on to do great things. While these are merely words, they are building an internal love for her sport and her understanding that I encourage and stand behind her.  If you follow me on IG Stories, you know my dedication to my children and their activities takes up A LOT of my time. A WHOLE LOT. I wouldn’t have it any other way, she can’t stay in the game if I’m not in it with her.

What I’m wearing: Athleta Salutation Modblock 7/8 Tight, Athleta Topanga Racerback Tank, Athleta Hyper Focused Bra

Keeping our girls active is a HUGE time and financial commitment. Both of which planning can help offset. As a busy mom, I get it, yet knowing the immeasurable benefits she’ll receive from staying in dance and the lessons she’ll learn from her studio keep me going and motivated to provide a great experience for her.

In addition to life lessons taking pride in her self care and appearance is another lesson I’m happy to teach her at a young age. She’s slowly wanting to have more say in her attire, and Athleta girl  is functional, age appropriate and perfect for girls to express themselves while having a level of comfort, support and functionality.

What she’s wearing:

Her Athleta Chit Chat tights are perfect for school and dance. Transitional clothing is always a win with children, because they grow so fast. The design and colors are perfect for her personality and they fit very well allowing her free range of movement.

The Athleta Girl Most Valuable Layer Tank allow her to move freely with it’s flowy double lined design, that allows air to flow through keeping her as cool as possible (literally and figuratively). What’s even better is it’s crafted with unstinkable technology. I think that feature speaks for itself but I’m all for it!

The Athleta Girl Reversible Upbeat Bra 2.0 is her absolute favorite. She spends a lot of time watching dancers on YouTube and she’s convinced wearing a sports bra is a sign that you are a real dancer. I love the criss cross design that allows for more movement and it is reversible, the opposite side is all black.

As mothers, aunties, friends, cousins, mentors, and all the other roles we play that I forgot to mention, let’s work hard to encourage our girls to stay in the game and fight it out to the end. Let’s vow to give them the support and confidence they need to fulfill their passions and live out their potential!