Parenting – Page 10 – Unlikely Martha

Back to Normal

Snowpocalypse has come and gone and everything in the “A” is back to normal…thank goodness. My son has not seen the classroom for basically a month. He had three weeks off for Christmas, went to school for two days and was out all of last week. He is ready and so am I.

Weekend was low key, a few weeks ago I decided to trade in my frequent flier miles for magazine subscriptions. I had to be honest with myself, I wasn’t going anywhere any time soon so seeing that I LOVE magazines this was a deal. I was very surprised to open my mailbox on Friday and find THREE shiny magazines staring at me. Did I mention I love magazines in all of their shiny, colorful, flashy glory. I stare at the photos, and I have been known to read an article or two. I stayed up way too late that night poring over their pages forgetting Saturday I would be running a daycare around here.

A friend of mine needed me to watch her children on Saturday, so I signed up to take on two 8 month olds, a 3 year old and a 5 year old…solo, all by myself..for 8 long hours. I survived, they tag teamed me at times, but I came out victorious, frazzled but nonetheless victorious. Shortly after she came to pick up her babies, the Mr. came home and as tired as I was I needed a moment to myself. I ventured out to Walmart and did the grocery shopping and picked up a few items for myself..you know nail polish, mascara, a book..the usual. Sunday, I whipped up a pretty decent dinner, put the kids to bed and enjoyed my Sunday chock full of trashy reality television.

Look at Lil Mama...she hasn't had those teeth for a week yet

Monday, I spent the day discussing with my son the great works of Dr. King and we watched a documentary. We had plans to venture down to Dr. King’s childhood home and visit the King Center but I woke up with a splitting headache so we will make that trek this weekend. As I was watching the documentary, it hit me that 40 years has not passed since this country has seen such large strides in the advancement of equality for all people. Viewing the program made me very thankful for Dr. King and his dream that has allowed me the ability to provide an experience for my children that their great grandparents didn’t have the opportunity to see. That realization has humbled me to appreciate every opportunity that I have and especially the influence I have on my children to reach for the sky and dream big, its my duty as their mother. Being a parent is such a daunting task…

Speaking of parenting, my dad rocks. He is a photographer and worked for National Geographic his entire career before he retired. He recently upgraded his camera and sent me his old one which just happens to be a Canon Rebel. I am just recently getting interested in photography and was surprised to find out that this camera is the “bee’s knees” in the blogging world. Please be prepared to be inundated with photos as a hone my craft…bwahahaha or should I say just figure out how to turn this thing on.

I am looking forward to this week, I have a meeting on Wednesday with a mentor/mentee group that I work with and on Thursday I am really excited about attending a vision board party that I have been invited to. Enough of my ramblings.

How was your weekend/MLK day?

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Lil Man• Parenting

Quiet as a Church Mouse

…children are to be seen and not heard. Can I get a virtual show of hands from those who were raised with that mantra. Let me do one better, remember going to visit the nice lady’s house and before you got there your mother told you not to accept anything and the lady insists on cutting you a piece of pie, you get the *side eye* from your mom but head to the kitchen hand in hand with the nice lady anyway. Yeah, those were the days.

So my son, has started talking back…at five. Must.get.the.last.word. So much to the point that we are having to devise a strategy. I do believe in discipline but not for everything #newagemama. When I was a child, I was very opinionated and outspoken but my mother shut that spirit in me down every chance she got. She was old school, she laid down the law and it was so. As a teenager, screaming back and forth was the name of the game. I was disobedient, and retaliated to her not listening by doing exactly what she told me not to do. There was never a discussion only screaming matches that fell on deaf ears for both her and I. As far back as I can remember I always felt like she never listened to me, until I became an adult and then still not so much.

Some believe children should only do as they are told, and truly don’t have a voice. Well maybe its the rebel in me rearing its ugly head again, but whenever I raise my voice at him, its almost like I hear my mother yelling at me, and I don’t like it. I have been thinking, and will discuss it with the Mr. maybe instead of silencing his need to be heard, we will create an enviroment conducive to him getting his point across and then as civilized parents and not screaming people we will attempt to explain the logic in what we are telling him to do. Maybe if he understood why he needs to go to bed early, or why its not cool to push the baby’s swing as high as it can go with her in it (true story) he will refrain from naughty activities and think before he acts.

Yes, he has quite the personality and the mouth to back it up

No, I’m not joking, I’m for real. Are you implementing a “new fangled” approach to discipline or are you keeping it “old school”. Have you dealt with this? I’m interested in hearing your method. We don’t judge around these parts..the mic is open!

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Family• NaBloPoMo• Parenting

To Have or Not To Have is the Question

Lil Mama left on Saturday evening and will be gone until Tuesday morning. I miss my baby, and although it has been really nice to have some time to myself at home, I can’t wait for her to come back. Tomorrow, Lil Man and I are going to head out to the city and visit the World of Coca Cola and Children’s Museum’s. He is looking forward to spending some time alone with me. It never really crossed my mind that he misses being the only child until he told me the other day. I now know I have to make a better effort at spending more one on one time with him.

Being a parent is so hard at times. I always want my babies to have the best of me and when he told me that he misses those times it made me feel bad that maybe as a mother I have neglected him in some way. I know I am being “drama queen” but that’s how it made me feel. I think we get so consumed some times in providing the basics for our children that we forget they could really careless about those things and would rather have us and our undivided attention. This is part of the reason why I struggle with having more children. I would love one more but honestly I don’t know if I could be fair and provide each with the level of attention that they would need. I don’t come from a large family, so I know some people have an argument regarding why a large family is suitable but for ME I don’t think its fair to have a house full of children if they can never get time alone with you..they need that time in their early years.

Also, having more children would further limit my time with the Mr. I got married and had children, I don’t think I would ever want to just become parents and married people in passing. Children require alot, and unfortunately they don’t stay sweet squishy babies for long, they grow up, talk back, want to borrow your car etc….I think people fall in love with the baby stage not realizing that as they grow they actually require your time and mental capacity. Parenting is such a huge task, and shouldn’t be taken lightly. Some may say I overthink everything but somethings just can’t be left to chance and that’s how I feel about parenting.

Okay, enough of my ramblings!! How many children do you want to have? How did you come to that conclusion? Am I crazy?!!

11 Comments

Family• My Babies• NaBloPoMo• Parenting

Family

Lil Mama is in Florida spending a few days with her godmother, and while she is away I have decided to take these days to hug on Lil Man a little tighter and give him some quality one on one time with the Mr. and I. As him and I lay in the bed watching Nick Jr. or Noggin in some places the “Family” song came on and while him and I were singing along, I really paid attention to the words. Family isn’t just relatives its whoever is in your heart…I love this!! I’m so glad you’re my {cyber} family!

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