Because I Said So

The tag line for my blog reads “The Rants and Raves of a Fab Mom”. Well the other day after the bagger at the grocery store very confidently referred to me as Ma’am I took a quick mental inventory of why he would think I was a Ma’am because in my thoughts at that moment there was nothing “fab” about being a Ma’am. So forgetting that I was wearing a pair of skinny jeans that were a tad too short, some leaned over gold flats, a huge ketchup stain on my shirt courtesy of my son,  two strand twists that were all twisted out and needed to be redone days ago, and the dead giveaway that I was pushing two children in a buggy I was appalled. I mean I am fab…right? *nod your head and look straight ahead*

Because I could not leave well enough alone, I just had to corner the young gentleman and ask him just how old did he think I was. Word to the wise, NEVER ask a teenager a question like this..NEVER. He responds with a slight grin, “I don’t know I guess about 40”. *dead* I can’t. At this point, the cashier has finished ringing up my groceries and we are all set to go. I quietly disclose to him that I am 32 like he cared but it gave me some satisfaction in the matter. That’ll show him .

Still on this hours later I started thinking what are the credentials that I possess *in my head* that qualifies me as being fab. Sure I’m more of a connoisseur of Yo Gabba Gabba than the latest fashions to walk the runways of Spring fashion week, nonetheless I would like to think I’ve still got it…a teeny bit. I’ve never been one to need validation..until this day. So I decided to come up with MY own reasons. Wanna hear it? Here it go

I’m Fab Because:

As I type this my nails are gold and sparkly

Nails

I listen to Lil Wayne at obscenely loud levels…no, not with the kids in the car. Okay, sometimes.

I’ve been to the club in the last year, not considering the fact that I complained about the loud music the.entire.time

I know how to Dougie..not a whole lot of consolation on this one seeing that Wolf Blitzer did it.

I still wear high platform heels..who cares that my knees hurt for days after

I paint my fingernails weekly

I manage to keep my sanity while chasing behind a budding 11 month old walker and a motor mouth 5 year old ALL DAY LONG

I wear sunglasses whilst driving the Milf mobile, and still get stares at the stop light

I get out of the house alone often and have drinks or dinner with my BFFs

I’m fab because I SAID SO!!

Fab is the shortened version of the word Fabulous which is defined as:

adjective:Almost impossible to believe;incredible. Exceptionally good or unusual; marvelous; superb

That sounds about riiight.So now that we have the official definition, and I’m quite sure that all of you possess a trait qualifies you as being fab..as if it really matters to anyone else but you.  Do share something special about yourself that “ups” your FAB quotient. I mean can you juggle bananas. Can you cook, fold clothes, talk on the phone and check homework simultaneously..What is it?

About the author
Mom, wife and friend. I moonlight as a cooker, baker, laundry folder and organizer. I like to think I do it in style. Unlikely Martha is my contribution to the internet in helping women "Keep House and Stay Fly!"

23 Comments

  1. I’m fab because I had a dance party in Charlotte Russe trying to put Baby to sleep in the ergo. They had great music and I danced like no one was watching. Baby Girl went down!

    The young lady who checked me out said her mom use to drive her around in the car to put her asleep. I told her gas is way too expensive for that.

    Thanks for the style tip. I now see much more use out of my lil bag of tackalicious!
    Mama Violet recently posted..Fashion Me

  2. I’m fab because three babies later I can still rock skinnies, I can still clear the dance floor and hold my own on the rare occasion that I actually go to a club and most importantly I do the things I do now with way more class and grace than I did when I was in my twenties. Thank God for that!

  3. LMBO!!! Girl…..this is my story! I have to remind myself that I am fab and guess what I do??? I do my makeup, go to the mall and buy me something short yet fab… That works! Also attempting to go out to “cool” events help! Bahahahahahaha!!! I am still laughing, great post!

  4. I am FAB because I am a mother, wife, teacher, friend, daughter and mentor and I rock at every one of those roles. I’m also FAB because when I went to a club with my daughter to celebrate her 21st birthday no one believed I was old enough to be her mother. We were even hit on by the same guys…… (but that was just wrong).

    Great post Mimi….thanks for the reminder!!
    Nikki recently posted..That little voice

  5. LOL Girl, I thought I lost my fab the other day when a student asked this girl if he could sketch her at the library. I came home and told the hubs I remember when I was being asked to have my picture sketched. He did his duty and promptly assured me that I still have it going on, it’s just that these youngin’s can’t recognize hawtness.
    Daenel T recently posted..Loose Threads and Other Random Thoughts

  6. You’ve still got it cause you drive the MILF mobile and not a Swagger Wagon (youtube)! I’m expecting my first in June and I’m hoping I can keep things together after the little boy makes his debut.

    1. Yes, you must keep it together! The Milf mobile is it, although that Swagger wagon video almost made me want one..Almost! Where all my mother, fathers at?! Where my kids at? I saw that video months ago. Hilarious!

    1. Downing a keg of beer? #icant with you! I did the same thing, and it warranted so much unsolicited responses from random people that I stopped doing it.

  7. I’m fab because my momma said so! But aside from that I’m fab because I can do hair. I mean really throw down! Lol. I taught myself and I worked in a salon as an assistant. I can do full head weaves and press n curls, individuals and wet sets. You name it, I can more than likely do it!
    krissy recently posted..Wordless Wednesday studying

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