For the past 5 years I have likely spent more time than not perusing the interwebs connecting and engaging with other moms. These interactions have exposed me to a variety of different parenting methods, and have offered more than a fair share of “Dear lady at Target that didn’t side eye me when my child threw a tantrum and broke a Lilly Pulitzer for Target vase.” You know of these articles of which I speak where we are all asked to have compassion for that mom struggling with her child because as an outsider looking in we don’t know that her child my have developmental or behavioral issues. I have read these articles and appropriately not side eyed that mom in the store and have at times offered my assistance if I see someone having a really hard time.
Compassion is a real thing and we all need to have it and display it when necessary.
That being said, if we are encouraging one another as moms to be more compassionate and less judgmental in our dealings with one another, let’s be mindful of how we let our children and their freedoms infringe on others.
Case in point.
In my daughter’s ballet class there is a student that is just….let’s say out of control. She is a constant disruption to the class, yells out and refuses to do what the teacher asks. The teacher reasonably tries to accommodate and encourage the child but depending on the day and how the wind is blowing she may or may not chose to participate. Here’s the thing, as a parent while I may exercise my right not to discipline my child, I would have to step in when I felt that my child’s issues were starting to impact and take time away from other students whose parent’s spend their hard earned money for uninterrupted lessons.
This is where I draw the line. While I can be compassionate and think about all of the reasons why a child may have a behavioral issue, please be mindful of the money I spend monthly to have my child participate in an activity. As a mother I don’t think I could sit back and watch my child no matter what his/her issue may be completely take time away from other paying customers without stepping in and disciplining when needed or maybe finding my child a private lesson if necessary.
The way my level of compassion is set up currently, if your child rams into my cart in Target while running full speed down a Target aisle as if it is a drag way (this happened), before issuing a side eye I kindly think your child has some behavioral issues and you deserve to be in Target like the rest of us because simply there would be no way that you would let that happen unless there were factors driving such behaviors that you have no control over. However, if you are continuously letting your child be a disruption in a setting outside of a public classroom, I’m handing out side eyes like candy on Halloween.
Seriously, I implore us all to really consider how our parenting methods affect those around us. My child won’t ram into your cart in Target without issuing an apology, and I expect the same respect…but I get it. If you are one of those that feel the need to let your child run free and disrupt others void of an apology I would hope you would expect to receive a side eye and not feel any kind of way.
This has been a NaBloPoMo rambling. Since I’m blogging everyday and this scenario has had me a little perturbed all day this has been my vent for the day. Thanks for listening?
Am I wrong? Am I still lacking in the compassion department? What would you do?