Lately my mind space has been occupied with a dilemma I’ve been having regarding my relationship with another individual. In the past, said person has spewed some pretty hurtful words and even more shady actions. After receiving what I felt was a heartfelt apology about their uncouth behavior and lack of civility, I was under the impression that we could indeed move on as friends and not look back at the past.
Lately, this person has been trying to reach out to me and I am feeling myself becoming enraged about the whole situation all over again. I hate reliving the past. I truly believe in the whole let bygones be bygones thing. I mean how can you ever move forward if you keep looking in the rearview mirror.
So here’s the deal. I am thinking that I am still upset because I never got to say my piece. I listened to their side of the story, and let it be. Although the relationship was never like it once was, it has been functional. Phone calls, emails, texts, social media, you know the story. I never felt like I needed to justify my feelings, so I didn’t. I didn’t solicit an apology it was brought to me. So now, some time later I am finding myself upset again. I mean so upset that I can’t answer the phone or have any contact with the person. It is not going to be too much longer that I can continue on this way based on the level of our association.
Here’s where you come in.
Do I reach out to the person and let them know why I was initially upset?
Do I totally get over myself, and force myself to move on. After all I had the opportunity to say my piece and I didn’t?
Do I throw the deuces, whip my hair back and forth and give them the *side eye* if they continue to try reaching out?
I am really thinking I should pray about it and ask God to allow me to fully forgive them and move on as normal without opening my mouth…easier said than done.
Is it really possible to forgive AND forget?