Unlikely Martha
Marriage Relationships The Mr.


September 2nd marks seven years that the Mr. and I have been married. The road has been long, bumpy, narrow, wide, and non existent at times but I am happy to say that it is now paved with asphalt and we have truly reached that point in our marriage where I would like to believe that nothing can break us.

I rarely speak about the Mr. in this space because he is some what private, not to mention I have something with people who are always talking about how spectacular their significant other is. I always feel like they are trying to convince themselves instead of me. That’s another story for another day. Kind of like no one goes around saying how awesome wives and mothers are because its expected…

I digress.

Well, I came up with the ingenious idea to have the Mr. and myself list out 7 things we have learned during this journey that has contributed to the current state of happiness within our marriage.

Keep in mind we are not experts!


1. It’s my job to provide

2. What’s mine is hers and what’s hers is hers…begrudgingly

3. Taking care of the children is our job, not just hers

4. Always answer my phone

5. Never go to sleep mad

6. Sometimes you just have to put your foot down..He’s talking about that jalopi of a 72 Cutlass he’s restoring

7. She loves me when I’m fresh out of the barbershop



1. Sometimes you really do have to relinquish control and let a man be a man

2. Do.Not.Nag

3. The one who is silent and refuses to argue in a fight is the winner..not really

4. Men need to be told they are loved and appreciated just as much as we do

5. There is more than one way to do many things. I am not the dictator.

6. Sometimes a little cussing goes a loooooooooooong way

7. When you’re wrong admit it…then fix it, however you see fit

Mr. and I had broken up for many years before getting back together for good. Here’s the song he stole my heart back with in 2002 *two steps with my boo*

He had game!

If you want the long version of our love story, we’re featured in Kokoa Magazine this month on Pages 40-43.

Do you believe in giving 2nd chances when it comes to love?

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  • Reply
    September 3, 2012 at 12:15 am

    Happy Anniversary! I’m glad to know that my Mr. and I aren’t the only ones who have found second chance love. I think that sometimes overcoming a hardship can build a bridge to stronger love. Many Blessing <3
    Brandyne recently posted..Re-Igniting My Fire

  • Reply
    September 3, 2012 at 12:57 am

    Awww,congratulations! I love love,so reading this, that you guys are unbreakable, that warms my heart. And the road analogy? YES.

  • Reply
    Melisa - Mommy This and That
    September 3, 2012 at 1:14 am

    Happy Anniversary! (for some reason as soon as I wrote this Tony Toni Tone’s Anniversary song popped into my head!)

    A second chance at love…I think it depends on why you parted ways initially. But yes, I always believe in second chances.
    Melisa – Mommy This and That recently posted..100 Piece Puzzle

  • Reply
    September 3, 2012 at 8:39 am

    Happy Anniversary!!! Ha, my hubby and I broke up in college before getting back together and getting engaged. Thanks God for true love and second chances!
    Tia recently posted..Stylish Saturday

  • Reply
    September 3, 2012 at 11:12 am

    Happy Anniversary!!! The do not nag is the hardest ever for me! But I am still learning!!
    LaShawn recently posted..Click it Up a Notch: August Favorite…

  • Reply
    September 3, 2012 at 11:18 am

    Black love exists people better recognize. Happy Anniversary after 7 years I have mastered the silent treatment we are so good at it that it makes us laugh even when angry.

  • Reply
    September 3, 2012 at 11:23 am

    I love this post. We have our 3 year coming up soon. I may have to give that a try. HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! Wish you many more.
    Teems recently posted..The "Good" Baby

  • Reply
    Dani @ okdani.com
    September 3, 2012 at 11:27 am

    I LOVE this post!
    …wait…..do not nag??? aw shoot….
    john and i broke up and got back together too.
    second chances work as long as the person has matured
    Dani @ okdani.com recently posted..It’s The Best Month Of The Year!

  • Reply
    September 3, 2012 at 12:42 pm

    Happy anniversary you guys!

    Honey and I have never broken up, we just reconnected after years of falling off. I do think we reconnected for a reason.
    krissy recently posted..Wordless Wednesday: pajama thug

  • Reply
    September 3, 2012 at 4:01 pm

    Awww, happy anniversary! I love the lists, great tips!
    Aracely recently posted..Madison is 3 years old today!

  • Reply
    September 3, 2012 at 4:07 pm

    Happy Anniversary to you and the Mr! I love both you and his lessons learned over the years, and I actually agree with just about all of them (that putting his foot down thing is a little hard to swallow…I know its true, but I won’t admit it out loud). I wish you guys many many many many more years of happiness!
    TheProDiva recently posted..Professional Divas Must Have…

  • Reply
    September 3, 2012 at 6:46 pm

    Awww I love love and your love story has to be one of my favs! There is more than my way of doing things is one lesson I learned will be applied to the right Mr Right! Celebrate all week you guys!
    Candace recently posted..Weekend Wrap Up

  • Reply
    September 3, 2012 at 7:57 pm

    congrats on 7 years! glad to hear you guys have a stronger marriage after some tough times! and those are good lessons to learn! : )
    Katie recently posted..So long summer . . .

  • Reply
    Mama Violet
    September 3, 2012 at 9:46 pm


    Back in our shacking up days, my husband and I broke up. I moved out. We got back together a week later but lived separately during mt one year lease. It was a great time of learning and growing. I feel like it needed to happen for our relationship to progress.
    Mama Violet recently posted..Oasap pyramid zebra necklace

  • Reply
    Joy and Sunshine
    September 3, 2012 at 10:10 pm

    Congratulations! That is truly a blessing in so many ways! Despite what popular culture makes it out to be, marriage is no joke. Here’s wishing you two many, many more happy anniversaries 🙂
    Joy and Sunshine recently posted..Denim, Leopard, and White

  • Reply
    September 3, 2012 at 10:42 pm

    Congrats chica! cute story!
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  • Reply
    this cookn mom
    September 4, 2012 at 6:15 am

    I totally believe in second chance love.

    Happy Anniversary!!!
    this cookn mom recently posted..The Game is On

  • Reply
    September 4, 2012 at 7:55 am

    Happy Anniversary! Such a great story!
    ChicRoni recently posted..I’m Twisted Up

  • Reply
    September 4, 2012 at 8:38 am

    Happy anniversary Mimi! My husband and I make 9 years this month as well. And I agree with you and your husbands whole LIST! LOL! Marriage is surely a journey!!

  • Reply
    September 4, 2012 at 8:44 am

    Congratulations! I totally agree with the things you both learned! 🙂 #BLMGirl
    Britt recently posted.."Motivational Monday" – Monthly Update!

  • Reply
    Erica T
    September 5, 2012 at 10:23 am

    I’m a bit late but Congratulations!!
    P.S. your list looks pretty identical to the rules we follow in our marriage- I love it!
    Erica T recently posted..To a great weekend….

  • Reply
    September 5, 2012 at 2:38 pm

    Happy happy anniversary to you and the Mr!! Big hugs to you sis!

  • Reply
    September 5, 2012 at 3:25 pm

    Happy Belated Anniversary! Love this list, by the way. It’s great to get their perspective on things and to just talk about where you see each other and your marriage!
    Amber recently posted..Dear Michelle: My Open Letter to the First Lady of the United States

  • Reply
    Baby Shopaholic
    September 10, 2012 at 9:48 am

    Happy Anniversary! Love that yall listed the 7! Marriage is an learning experience for a few years. After you make it past that I think you are good to go.
    Baby Shopaholic recently posted..Weekend Style: Aviators + Khaki

  • Reply
    September 11, 2012 at 11:42 pm

    Happy Anniversary Mimi and Mr…. I’m just now catching up on my blogs. I’m trying to stop the silent treatment, gosh it’s so hard to stop it….May y’all be blessed with many more.

    • Reply
      September 12, 2012 at 12:55 am


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