Source: thecircleproject.com via Mimi on Pinterest
I saw this posted on Pinterest the other day and with the likings of a reflex I hit repin under the premise that people need to learn to deal with us just the way we are, or kick rocks. For some reason I found myself still contemplating this quote nearly an hour later except at that time I likened it to something that the Mr. is always saying to me…
” You aren’t a real friend at times. You tell people what they want to hear, not what they need to hear”
Hmmm…He may be right, but let me explain. When it comes to folks and their lives, marriage, kids etc. my name is Bennett and I ain’t in it. I will listen, say a few unh huhs and keep it moving. People will do what they want to do and I am not in the mood to mess up a friendship with my opinion on an issue that has nothing to do with me.
We all know that one person who will talk your ears off about their problems you say your piece and they continue on with their foolery. That is 20 minutes of time, breath and sanity that you can’t regain. I refuse unless it is a safety issue.
On the other hand I see the Mr.’s point. When we sit back quietly and not in the least bit say girl it’s not them its you, we are in essence being a bad friend. If we don’t stand up and speak the truth and say friend, those 1,409 men that you have dated that all ran the other way, it wasn’t them it was you, we are slightly condoning their belief that nothing is wrong with them, it’s everybody else. If that is indeed the fact we are hurting them cause man number 1,410 and so on is going to do the same thing if they have an awful character flaw that needs to be exposed.
I can see how our silence really is a hindrance when people are really requesting our true feelings and thoughts on a situation. Our silence on an issue in response to someone who is really looking for an answer can easily be misconstrued as validation on their behalf. When in reality we are like girrrrlllll you can’t be serious but instead of saying that we go along with it or just say a trite unh huh and look for a way to get off the phone.
I would say the remedy to this is to tread lightly and edit your thoughts before unleashing the truth or at least YOUR truth on the matter. People will do with it what they will, but at least you will feel like you put in your say on the matter.
Now, I am a firm believer in the fact that if your opinion was not requested…please keep
yo’ mouth shut it to yourself!!!
I have only been on this earth 33 years and I don’t have a ton of knowledge but I do know sometimes we are indeed broken and we do need to be fixed. True friends will know this and will help us get to a good place, the thing is we have to be open to it.
I’ll say it. I’m broken on many levels but I have those handy girls that will come to the rescue and help me fix it, but I am open to constructive criticism. Are you?! Will you hand it out if asked, or do you tend to tread lightly like me?