Learn to Say H*ll NO and Other Habits to Adopt in 2014

I’m not much of a resolution girl but I have been in deep thought about new habits to adopt in 2014 to make my life easier, encourage personal growth and see the ideas in my head go from thought to manifestation.

I am by no means an expert, but as I created my list for the new year I thought I might share them with you!



Just Say NO:  Assuming you aren’t into recreational drug use this “Just Say No” has not a thing to do with Reagan’s campaign but everything to do with managing YOUR time and maintaining YOUR sanity.

Saying no shouldn’t be as hard as it is, but some of us feel the need to be helpful when in reality when we refuse to say NO we are often times making life harder for ourselves. In the new year I’ve vowed to never answer someone right away if I can help it. I have decided to respond by saying I need to check my calendar to allow myself time to decide if taking on said task will actually be feasible for me to accomplish without too much disruption to my routine. I give you permission to add H*ll no as necessary so that said party knows its real and to come correct before asking you to do things they could surely do themselves.

Write it Down: You would think this one is self explanatory and obvious, however as a person who has left the bread and milk in the grocery store when they were the main items I went for….I think pencil and paper need to be my friend in the new year.

Keeping track of children’s schedules, room mom duties and bills my mind will play tricks on me. I’ve found lately that if I make lists of the things I need to do, things I need to buy and places I need to be my mind doesn’t seem as cluttered and I don’t feel AS flustered.  I’ve bribed myself into this new habit my purchasing a plethora of planners, journals, pencils and pens. Make these necessary evils pretty and you are more likely to make proper use of them.

Designers Guild


Plan Tasks and Allocate Time: Again, in the past my important tasks were jumbled in my head along with where I might find an AKA sweatshirt and if not careful the latter would come before the necessary and I would be left at the end of the day SMH because the important tasks weren’t accomplished but I had my sweatshirt though. This is a true story.

I am now writing down my tasks daily and prioritizing them by importance and allocating a time frame in which each needs to be completed. All business related matters are handled first and everything else comes second. If I haven’t completed the task in the allotted time I move on to the next task and come back around to it after all important tasks have been touched. Of course this is up for revision depending on how important the task is. I am finding this to be beneficial in making sure I get everything done daily.

Accountability Partners: Birds of a feather flock together anyone? There is nothing worse than starting in the same place as someone and they make moves and you are left standing where you started. Use a little friendly competition and let accountability to a like minded person push you forward in 2014.

The key is finding that person that will politely READ you if you haven’t accomplished that goal and reported back within the specified time. I have found some accountability partners where I will be embarrassed and shamed if I didn’t at least have some sort of update to give them on my goal progress. Sometimes being accountable to ourselves isn’t enough. We need deadlines and sometimes we need positive people to help us enforce them.

Start It. Finish It: In the past I have been the master of starting a million things and finishing none of them. Call me Jemimah of all trades, master of none. I’m tired of not seeing things through to completion when I know I have the ability to finish them.

The key to this I believe is being realistic with oneself before starting on a journey. Anything is possible but the real question is do you have the passion to see it through. Answering those hard questions before starting may help with making sure completion becomes the ultimate goal. I’ve decided to sit down and take the time as well as consult with my accountability partners before setting off on anything new. Sometimes perspective will let us know the likelihood of us finishing something before we even start.



Y’all know I’m no kind of expert on life but I’ve made enough mistakes and as I knock on 35 I have come to the conclusion that processes are not here to hurt us but to make us better. I’ll roll with it.

Have you had an epiphany on new habits to adopt that may help some of us? I implore you to share! #SharingIsCaring

About the author
Mom, wife and friend. I moonlight as a cooker, baker, laundry folder and organizer. I like to think I do it in style. Unlikely Martha is my contribution to the internet in helping women "Keep House and Stay Fly!"


  1. I am the queen of writing it down. I have an app on my phone for it, but I never manage to use it. Everything works better for me when I just get a planner and WRITE IT DOWN. I’m on the hunt for the perfect one for the new year.
    LaShawn recently posted..Words to Live By #1

  2. I plan to speak my mind more in 2014. That could fit in with saying ‘no’. In 2013 I realized that I was way too accommodating. I noticed that I was being overly considerate to people who were not necessarily considerate of my time and schedule. I’m not here for that in 2014. So like you, I will be checking my schedule and getting back with folks.
    Tia recently posted..The Mommy Olympics

  3. I’m on the hunt some accountability partners. I also plan utilizing both my print and phone planners more this year. I’ve already started using my blog planner to help keep me organized. And towards the end of last year, I finally learned to start saying to say no. Sometimes, we say to the wrong things and wrong people. Not this year!
    K. Elizabeth @ YUMMommy recently posted..The Blogmopolitan Quiz

    1. I suck at using my phone for some reason. I need it all written down, preferable in pencil. I am way anal like that when it comes to journals and planners.

    1. It’s amazing how connected I am with SM, yet I do not like to use my phone to keep track of my calendar items. I would much rather write them down.

  4. Learning to say no is a big one for me. I hate to offend anyone, so if someone offers me something – often times I will say yes just to be polite. Whether it’s what I want or not. I have to get better about that.

  5. You kind of hit my mental list of what I want to do this year dead on. Within my business, I definitely need to learn to say no or set boundaries with clients so as not to be taken advantage of- moneywise AND timewise. I really need to write down my goals 🙂
    Chelsea recently posted..dressing casually

  6. I love this entire list but Hell No has to be my favorite. That and write it down – I also go to the store for milk and leave with $100 less and no milk.

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